San Diego Comic Con, Dragon Con in Atlanta, Georgia, Cinema Con in Las Vegas touting Into the Storm (see Getty image below of Richard Armitage, Sarah Wayne Callies, and Director Steven Quale), Hobbit Con in Bonn, Germany, and now Wonder Con in Anaheim, California . N.B. Click here for the link to ArchedCory1’s Hobbit Con 2013 Report on the Heirs of Durin site.
What do these “Con” conventions all have in common? Dear Friends, their common link is that I, Grati, cannot easily travel to them by car or by train. You see, I’m a fraidy cat about flying. And it’s not like I’m a flying virgin. I have flown *Grati whines cutely*– four times, round trip (eight flights technically, there and back again *wink*).
So what is a girl/lady like me to do if adventure and fun–and the movie stars whom she would someday like to see in person so she could swoon literally–aren’t at my nearest big city hub of Chicago, Illinois in the U.S.? Well, I propose that Chicago develops its own entertainment industry convention event. Snap!
I briefly thought about calling this Chicago convention Actor Con–where actors could meet other actors and schmooze about their projects–with fans milling about them on red carpets–but awards shows already do that. Another idea of mine was to have a Theatre-Con festival, where actors could perform snippets from their recent stage plays–most definitely in the round, and with long hair. *Purrr* *baver* But then, the theatres of the world would go dark for several days, depriving their cities of thespian entertainment. Hmmm. Or maybe a Con-Con, kind of a meta convention across the entertainment industry. But that might prove too broad and unwieldy–and sink Chicago into Lake Michigan with the weight of Hollywood’s and other countries filmmakers’ egos in attendance.
Finally, I had it! We (meaning many of us, not in the royal we sense) are only/mostly interested in one man, one exquisitely talented and oh so handsome actor/storyteller–and everything related to him–the British actor Richard Armitage. So we could call the Chicago based entertainment industry convention event Armitage Con–with it possibly to be held at one of the large meeting venues, like McCormick Place. Here is a sample fake poster that I made (right, Richard Armitage portrait from the LA THDofS Premiere 2013 by Steve Granitz, WireImages, courtesy of Getty Images).
An Armitage Con convention could be an entertainment industry event devoted to Richard Armitage, his projects and the colleagues RA has acted with more than once. And the convention event could be touted for actors, directors, producers, creative filmmaker types (think special effects, makeup, etc.), fans, cinema owners, the press (notice, I didn’t say journalists), stylists, etc. Another feature of this convention event that I would require is that the event special attendees/presenters–such as Richard Armitage–would be announced well in advance as to which stars were attending and when so that people/fans can make travel plans, have a garage sale, and raid their 401 ks in order to attend. And time wise, I’m thinking early October 2014–after Richard Armitage’s The Crucible play closes, and between the Into the Storm dvd release press and the push for The Hobbit: There and Back Again movie premiere and release press beginning in earnest in November. Snap! Besides, Chicago in the Fall with the leaves turning colors is gorgeous!
Here is a potential fake itinerary for a proposed Armitage Con:
1) Day One–Our Guy Day Friday
a) 8am to 12noon—Registration involving microchipping the attendees so only registered persons get into convention events–no pain, no gain. This microchip stays in situ and be used and accessed for other fan convention events–becoming the convention industry standard. There will be dvd and RA projects promotional materials sales booths set up in the exhibition hall to keep the already checked in participants occupied. Personally, I especially want to check out the life size RA bed pillow. Sighhh!
b) 2:00pm to 4:00pm—Reception for Attendees hosted by “3ws dot RichardArmitage [insert fabulous RA fan resource site of your choice] dot com” with a special guest appearance, by the man himself! Well, really only RA’s life sized card board cutout will be on hand for fans to take their pictures with. Think, Flat Richard. This will be a major fan schmoozing–a meet the fan face behind the gravatar event. Wireless is available throughout McCormick Place for live blogging. Let’s just hope the net doesn’t crash when all the bloggers blog and tweet simultaneously.
c) 6:00pm to 10:00pm—An Evening with Our Favorite Star; formal wear required (historical era fashion is your choice); At the remarks portion toward the end of the scrumptious banquet of all of Richard Armitage’s favorite foods (like Thai Curry Chicken, etc.), clips from Richard Armitage’s various artistic projects in film and audio will be shown/heard. There will also be dancing with spot on Richard Armitage in character look-a-likes being auctioned off to support RA’s Just Giving charities. And maybe, just maybe the Real Richard Armitage will be one of these blokes. Do you feel lucky that your bid might get you a dance with this devilishly handsome actor–and maybe even get a kiss? VISA credit and debit cards accepted. No cash please. Mr. Armitage doesn’t want twenty dollar bills stuffed down his trousers–which happened at his last charity soiree with dancing. However, 10 pound notes are acceptable.
2) Day Two–Sexy Saturday Panels of Armitage Projects & Exhibits
a) 8:00am Donuts and Coffee with Spooks series 7 and 8 Actors, but no RA. Now that he no longer has a 4:00am Hobbit films makeup call, RA sleeps in. And our convention Personal Assistant Talent Minders (PATMs) really have to pound RA’s hotel suite door to get him going in the morning. I wonder what woke RA up at 4:00am for his Hobbit filming–since he said that he bicycled into the studio each morning?
b) 10:00am Costume Designer RA Character Career Wear–from John Standring Sheep Farmer Onesies to John Thornton Cravats to Sir Guy of Gisborne Black Leather to John Porter Fatigues to Thorin Oakenshield Pelts and Boots, etc. Examples of the real costumes will be on display (right, Thorin Oakenshield’s leather, chest armour, and pelt);
c) 12noon Boxed lunch Sandwiches with Set Designers and their take on creating mood with space;
d) 2:00pm Movie Stunts for Heroes and Villains and Everything in Between–Try your hand at sword play, or riding a mechanical Warg, or running over changing terrain and through fire; or riding a wheel barrow down a mock molten gold sluice, or hang suspended from chains and tree limbs, or fly on an eagle wings, etc., at the many stations in the main exhibition hall;
e) 4:00pm to 6:00pm Richard Armitage will Discuss his Current Projects (artistic, not DIY). And then he will sign movie posters and such. People wanting their body parts signed by Mr. Armitage should limit said body parts to arms and shoulders–nothing lower, nor a body part usually clothed for decency, please. Mr. Armitage’s favorite wines will also be served, so please drink and expose yourself responsibly and discreetly. Oh and this is a wine drinking, not a wine tasting event–so no spitting into nearby plant receptacles, please;
f) 8:00pm Armitage Con Banquet then Keynote Speech by Richard Armitage (at about 10:00pm)–RA will be speaking about “All the Roles Where I’ve Loved Before”. This speech will include RA’s views about his characters’ romances in film–the good, the bad, and the so good that he forgot it was supposed to be fake. Julio Iglesias will also be singing for his supper during the banquet’s dessert of chocolate cheesecake. More wine and decaf coffee will be served. Here is a retrospective of some of those romantic RA character moments in the colinfever RA character video compilation, “Richard Armitage – Passionate Kisses”:
3) Day Three–Fun Day Sunday Panel
a) 8:00am Breakfast on Your Own–or with whomever you hooked up with Saturday night, *wink* (remember to hook up responsibly, too);
b) 10:00am A Panel Discussion of RA’s Characters’ Head and Facial Hair by Leading RA Fan Proponents–beard or no, and short or long hair, etc. The moderator and Co-Presenter is Oscar Winner and Thorin Oakenshield Hair and Makeup Oscar Nominee, Tami Lane (Tami Lane and Richard Armitage as Thorin Oakenshield, pictured right);
c) 12noon Lunch on the Lawn of the Art Institute of Chicago. Then Richard Armitage will do a final Q &A and sign dvd copies of his miniseries “The Impressionists” at the Art Institute Museum Gift Shop as a benefit for the Art Institute’s educational programming, before he jets off to parts unknown for his next movie role (or skiing trip)
P.S. Of course, my alternative proposal would be for Warner Bros. Pictures to have one of the The Hobbit: There and Back Again premieres in Chicago. Snap!
Disclaimer: The above musings were my highly facetious and purely fictitious pie in the sky dreams. There is not now, nor has there ever been an Armitage Con planned for The City of Chicago–or anywhere else, for that matter. But! I won’t be peeved if someone else chooses to run with my idea–as long as I get to attend for free. Ha! Snap!