Wanting Something More: More or Less, January 08, 2016 Gratiana Lovelace (Post #857)

I’m always in awe of people who have a pithy way of social media sharing their lives in small clumps/posts/tweets, etc. I am interested in reading/seeing about their new entertainment center layout, or their recent baked confection, quotes they like, or even their harangue about something that irked them that day.

I don’t do that–share minutia about my day to day life in social media. Though I might share tidbits within certain forum confines–and make a few likes or comments here and there on tweets and blogs that I like–my life goes virtually undocumented. Ha!

Although, yesterday, I tweeted about my wish for a hunky physical therapist who looked like this guy below (the talented British actor Richard Armitage as a Gym Trainer in tv’s 2003’s Cold Feet):

Can you blame me? Of course, if I did have a hunky gym trainer slash physical therapist like him, I wonder if I would get well faster? Or would I find ways to still need his therapy attentions? That is one of life’s burning philosophical questions that I won’t have to face. *wink*

My lack of personal minutia revelations is partially a privacy thing and partially a feeling that my observation about my male dog peeing on my female dog–because he couldn’t wait for her to get out of the way to mark his territory again–is amusing only to me. Of course, I found that incident amusing long after I cleaned her up.

Also, the fact that I cleared out my clothes closet of items two or more sizes too big–creating an open space that I forgot existed–is one part celebratory as in “girl, you need to buy some more smaller clothes that fit the new you”; and one part realizing that I am ceding the other half of our small walk in clothes closet behind the door area to my husband–losing valuable closet/shelf territory to him. Previously, my toehold in our shared closet was two thirds. But he’s taller, and his clothes take up more room–if he would ever hang them up. *shakes head*

That’s another thing about my wonderful hubby–his seeming inability to hang up his freshly washed shirts and trousers. He tosses them onto a pile on the bench at the end of our bed. So then if he wants to wear his now wrinkled shirts and look decent, he will need to iron them–he made the wrinkles, he can iron those wrinkles out–or put a sweater over them.

Yet, my man has his moments–in and out of our bedroom. Nope, not going there. Some things are sacrosanct. But his extracurricular activities–such as in loading the dishwasher–are much appreciated by me. That is the way to my heart.

And I don’t suppose anyone is interested in my recent discovery that cushioned restaurant booths work for me–now that I’m a bit thinner, despite my skirt and dress wearing attire. I swear, whomever designs those booths (be they male or female) should try sliding into them in a skirt or a dress–and not have their skirt or dress torque around their body such that the twisting fabric is hard to untwist in a ladylike way as the table edge pins you to the cushioned booth’s seat back–and your clothed bosoms lay on the table, and needing a garnish so they don’t look out of place. Ha!

A decidedly bright spot in my work life these days is that my relatively recently acquired newish coworker is a delight to work with–personally and professionally. I especially like her nonverbal means of conveying agreement or thanks for some info or instructions that I shared with her, via her displaying her opposable thumbs in vertical orientation–e.g. the image below (Richard Armitage again, this time as a sheep farmer in 2002’s Sparkhouse”):


In my responding to my hubby’s blog post about his bemoaning the lack of outdoor bicycling weather until Spring–and my calculating that it is 73 days away–makes me wonder do I want a second real snowfall so that it seems like Winter? I’m a girl who likes my four seasons–in addition to the beautifully stirring “The Four Seasons” composed by Vivaldi (that sound fabulous on my new Sony headphones via a video on You Tube! ), that I first heard because of the charming 1981 movie The Four Seasons with Alan Alda (I’ll have to watch that again soon). The Vivaldi music quickly became one of my favorite classical pieces to listen to. Or, do I want Spring to hurry up and get here–along with golf and planting flower boxes on our backyard deck?

And like the four seasons, Spring will usher in my need for a new cut & color.  After a week of moaning like Jo March (“My Hair”) about being sheared of my long hair in December 2015–11 inches worth!–and donating it to Locks of Love–I’m liking my bobbed hair. I feel like a twenties flapper–or Lady Mary Crawley on Downton Abbey (portrayed by Michelle Dockery, below), but without Lady Mary’s penchant for turning men away. I have one man and he’s a keeper! And yes, I realize my good fortune at having found him nearly twenty eight years ago–or, he found me. Ha!


And then I read the New York Times article online about male biological clocks and the truth about bachelor singledom not being all that great titled “Meet the New York Bachelors Who Yearn for Something More” by Sridhar Pappu (January 7, 2016). Oh fellas!   Can we talk? Waiting (pining away) until later in life to experience the comforts of not being single any more resonates with me–in wanting to have someone to share your life with.

Afterall, I was a late bloomer for love. And my second ever blog post here–“Late Bloomers for Love Can and Do Bloom” –was about my suggestions for men wanting to measure up and be worthy, in order to find and keep that special person to love. Of course, I’m no expert–my being a one man woman, literally. But I snagged a good one. And one man is all it takes.

So though like the New York men in the NYT article, I want something more in my life–sometimes. But, that something more would mean nothing without my someone special in my hubby.   Like the Rod Stewart song “You’re in My Heart” (lyrics) goes:

“You’re in my heart, you’re in my soul
You’ll be my breath should I grow old
You are my lover, you’re my best friend
You’re in my soul.”

And yet, “A Tiny Corner of My Heart” still has room for one more …who happens to also be a gentleman New Yorker (RichardArmitage by Leslie Hassler for NY Moves, October 2013, below left).   And here is a more current visage of the man (Richard Armitage selfie from Christmas 2015 well wishes tweet, below right):

2013-NYMoves-interview-Dec2013-pix1-ofRichardArmitage-byLeslieHassler_Jan0716ranet  2015--XMAS-wishes-RichardArmitage-selfie_Dec1915RCAtweet-crop

Purrrr!  I hope that you have a nice day and great start to your weekend!

P.S. So though I shared a few tidbits about my life here, hopefully they weren’t too boring. Ha!

About Gratiana Lovelace

Gratiana Lovelace is my nom de plume for my creative writing and blogging. I write romantic stories in different sub genres. The stories just tumble out of me. My resurgence in creative writing occurred when I viewed the BBC miniseries of Elizabeth Gaskell's novel North & South in February 2010. The exquisitely talented British actor portraying the male lead John Thornton in North & South--Richard Crispin Armitage--became my unofficial muse. I have written over 50 script stories about love--some are fan fiction, but most are original stories--that I am just beginning to share with others on private writer sites, and here on my blog. And as you know, my blog here is also relatively new--since August 2011. But, I'm having fun and I hope you enjoy reading my blog essays and my stories. Cheers! Grati ;-> upd 12/18/11
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21 Responses to Wanting Something More: More or Less, January 08, 2016 Gratiana Lovelace (Post #857)

  1. I have issue with trainers who are too attractive…they render me unable to concentrate. That would be especially so with anyone remotely resembling Richard Armitage. ;) I’d rather get in, get it done, and get out.

    But congratulations and good going on ridding yourself of the clothes that no longer fit, and for the best of reasons! Good to do that so that you never go back.

    I’m not one to talk about minutiae either on social media. But I like when others share unique experiences. But just a note, I think the incident regarding the dogs may or may not be a medical issue. I would observe him and see if he does other things that are out of the ordinary, unless that kind of behaviour has been in his character for years. (And if so, you have my sympathies regarding the clean up. ;) )

    Single men these days: some long term observations on social media I’ve made indicate that things are not going so well for many of them. The bitter ones who have been in relationships complain much about the issues with women (nagging, over spending/using them) are saying in the same breath what they want from a ‘good’ woman (which amount to caring for him in ways that resemble indentured servitude.) What they want doesn’t exist in this dual-working partners world, and the saddest part is that their fathers had that, and sometimes at our mothers’ expense. It’s a generational thing that probably can’t be helped at this point. Women who are still married in my (our?) generation are still coping with this.

    Hopefully late-bloom lovers have worked through some of these inconsistent and contradicting expectations and I say God speed and more power to your love!

    But unfortunately for the single men out there who still have these expectations, the single women of my generation, and a solid camp in the younger generations, are happily–as Annie and Aretha said–doing it for themselves. I see it only getting worse for men unless they grow up and accept their share of household maintenance needs.

    However, what this also means is that women can no longer expect men to foot the bill when courting them. This is the only way they will get men to understand that we can’t be bought and we are not prizes to be won.

    I may have gone overboard here, but there’s my two-cents-working-on-two-bits. :)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Atta girl crystalchandlyre!
      Love your comment! And the “indentured servitude” phrase was priceless! And Lady, we’re just telling the fellas the way it is–our terms. If they want love, cuddles (and then some), someone to tell them that their shirt needs to be tucked in so their orange Jockey’s don’t show, commiserate when their work (like ours) has its WTH (what the heck) moments, etc., then they can pony up and share the housework, and the relational development/sustenance responsibilities! Snap!
      Lady Power Cheers! Grati ;->

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Wendy says:

    Grati I loved reading this not boring at all your writing is very descriptive. I do agree with you tho sometimes Twitter can become s little tedious I’m not interested in what people are eating for their meals. Maybe restaurants would be different. However do let us know from time to time about your days.


    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Wendy,
      Thanks for your nice note! The only things that really become tedious for me on Twitter will start to happen right now–that we’re switching into high gear for presidential election campaigns season in the U.S.–if people politicize their Twitter feeds. And I have had to unfollow a few people in the past because of it. They need to get a separate Twitter account for their political leanings. I get my “political” elsewhere.
      I follow people on Twitter (or Facebook) because they have interesting things to say and share about Richard Armitage, the fine arts in general, culture, society, themselves, life, philosophy, etc. It is my respite from worries and cares that are out of my locus of control.
      Cheers! Grati;->


  3. saraobsessed says:

    Hello! Congrats on the weight loss and new hairstyle. Wish downsizing my closet was my new years project rather than the new entertainment center. I feel it in my knees still. Took hubby & I quite a bit of teamwork to set it up. We’re going back to London in 2016 and hope the flight isn’t claustrophic again. Very best to you & yours this year and in years to come. S.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi saraobsessed,
      Thanks for your nice note and well wishes! And I loved your new entertainment center! The aesthetic is very sparing and minimalist. I’m trying to get there myself. I have long past reached the stage of “owning” tons of dvds.We stream! Snap! Except, of course, I did buy The Hobbit Trilogy Extended Edition with appendices, etc. But we still have an extensive catalogue of dvds faves to choose from in a pinch–in a tall four shelf shelf with wicker bins for each genre. ;) Ha!
      Cheers! Grati ;->


  4. January 08 – 09, 2016–Thanks for liking this post! I’m glad that you enjoyed it! Cheers!

    crystalchandlyre, saraobsessed, Carolyn, Evie Arl, jholland, obscura, & Servetus


  5. Kitty says:

    I confess I share minutiae on social media. My motto – “Let me show you a picture of my grandchildren!” ;)

    I love this post, G. You may have “snagged a good one” but he caught a keeper, too.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Kitty, Thanks for your kind note! And I love your sharing about your family and your tailoring/design business! You have a gift and you are a gift in both spheres! I’m living vicariously through you! So keep it up! Cheers! Grati;->


  6. Perry says:

    I liked learning about what’s going on with you, Grati. Like you, I write only sparingly about personal life stuff, and not that personal at all, but it is fun to give up a little and get a little glimpse of the person behind the header. Congrats on the new look.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Perry,
      Thanks for your very nice note and well wishes! Glad that you enjoyed the glimpse! And were I to “drop another veil or two”, I might reveal that my lunch today consists of crackers, summer sausage, celery, garlic hummus, and diet decaf pepsi–a departure from my usual salad. But I won’t say how “comfy” I got when I dashed home to eat it. A girl has to have some mystery about her. Ha! Cheers! Grati ;->


  7. Esther says:

    That was a nice little glimpse into your life… :) And I always love reading about someone who still loves their partner of many years!. :) Congrats on downsizing and your new haircut!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. jholland says:

    Congrats on the weight loss! I loved this post… a little day in the life of Grati!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi jholland, Thanks for your lovely note and well wishes! Grati-land happenings ended tonight with my dropping a glass pie plate in the kitchen–shattering glass everywhere. Ugh! My left arm has had a weakness since I broke it at the wrist 12 years ago. My hubby instantly hopped up to sweep up the glass shards–my knight in shining armour, dear man–since I was barefoot. Ha! Cheers! Grati;->


  9. Always enjoy reading your comments. Congrats on your weight loss, know how it feels, if you were like me had a difficult time realizing it was real and a hard time purchasing correct size. And a new hairstyle, always great, I went opposite. Grew my hair long ( down to waist) Most of all congrats on having a great guy, that’s fantastic. I just love hearing about someones normal day. My day is made when I enjoy a good laugh. Social media is to have fun, enjoy animal pics and art and some good pictures of RA will suitable comments :) um hmm


    • Hi IrishWitch313, Thanks for your kind comments and well wishes! Wow on your long hair! In the end, I was ready for mine to be cut–untangling my hair each morning after washing it in the shower was a challenge. And its length had reached to the point that my short arms almost didn’t extend far enough for rolling up the hot rollers. Ha!
      Social media is fun and informing at times–and a great way to connect in meaningful ways with people around the world. And what makes my hubby so special is that we laugh as much as we love–which is considerable. But as to a “normal” day? I’m still trying to figure that one out. Everyone has their own “normal” that works for them–and that’s okay. Cheers! Grati ;->


  10. Servetus says:

    Great post!
    I can’t say I envy married friends in any really meaningful way, though. I occasionally wonder what will happen to me as an elderly single, but perhaps I’ll die before it becomes acute. All the reasons I can think of wishing I had a partner are things that can be addressed in other ways that involve way less commitment. And I feel a huge sigh of relief when I walk in at night and shut the door and know for certain that no one else is there. Different strokes, I guess.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Servetus, Thanks for your very kind note! And as you indicated, people can and do live their lives happily unmarried or unattached. Friends and family fulfill any relational needs they might have. And I have many of my old college friends who are single, single again, selectively single, etc. They’re doing great! Everyone has to discover what works for them, then live life with gusto. Cheers! Grati ;->


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